Friday, October 30, 2009

Leaving home

a A lot happening in the skipper household at the moment. Amongst our bits of finishing off and refining our family home our eldest daughter is flying the coup so to speak. Heading up to the sunny part of our country...yes that time has come as it comes to us all and i am afraid i haven't been copping that well. I guess you know that one day it is going to happen but when it finally comes around and so so quickly it takes you back and you realise that finally that the day has arrived. I cannot imagine coming home and finding that the young lady that i share so much with will not be there and even though she will only be a phone call away i will find not looking at her smiling face seeing her reaction to every word i say , very very difficult. You can talk to your husband or friends but i guess only mothers that have had their children already leave will totally understand. I would really appreciate any ones advise or help as i am feeling very lonely and she hasn't even left yet.


*The Beautiful Life* said...

Hi Amanda,

Do I EVER understand...

Like you, my daughter is truly my best friend.

She started college last year and it DOES take some getting used to.

But.... you DO ultimately settle in and find that place where you begin once again to be busy with your day-to-day goings on (like your shop, etc) and new things come into your life to keep you busy and basically, you keep moving forward and TALK, TALK, TALK to her by phone! :)

You just might find that signing up for Skype is the BEST thing you'll ever do to ease this transition.

You can both chat online and video chat, too! This may seem crazy, but my daughter and I have been known to stay logged into Skype ALL day long and catch each other as we're online. And... we have also been know to turn the video part on and then go about our business (each of us in our own rooms) but chatting away as we do....It is truly like "being there!" and way better than just a speaker phone, etc.

Well, the last thing that really helps (for me, anyway) is seeing for myself how incredibly HAPPY my daughter is now... and she shares it with me so much that I feel a part of it. Your joy is increased by seeing her joy -- and that in itself helps ease the loss. ;)

You. Can. Do. This. :)



Josephine Tale Peddler said...

Amanda, I was nearly in tears reading this post. My daughter is only four so I have a way to go. I had her later in life. However, I can relate to how you must be feeling as I can cry just thinking of the day she will leave me. I really cherish every moment with my daughter. I read Goldie Hawn's book 'A Lotus grows in the Mud' and she spoke eloquently about her distress and grieving process when Kate Hudson left home. I think what you are going through is totally natural and part of a grief process. Motherhood seems to be as much about letting go and helping our chicks become independent as anything else. My only advice is to focus back onto Amanda and start to move towards things you want to achieve still. You and your daughter will always be close even when there's physical distance between you. I wish I had more practical advice to give you but I send you my love and a cyber-hug. That is the trouble with Tasmania and why I hesitate on coming back (the chicks want to fly the nest too far) Your daughter is so stunning! She does look like you too. xx

Simply Stated ~ Rebecca said...

Oh Amanda ~ I am in the middle somewhere between Ruth and Josephine. And have been feeling some of the same emotions lately.

With 3 children I am at all points of the spectrum and there are days my emotions run from happy to sad all in the same stream...One ready to fly, one for whom the world is passing to slowly and cannot wait to seize the world by its horns, and one who is still happy to be mom's shadow.

I wish I could give grand words of advice ~ but the best I can give is to always make time and take time to talk, talk, talk! And always say "I Love You".... Even if you have to call them or text them on their cell phones to do it!
Sending Hugs